‘Inspiring Change’


The Working Woman

Sita, 43, is from the village of Dokhini Raipur. She works as a domestic help in four middle class families that live in a residential apartment Kolkata. Her own house is a pukka one too, consisting of two rooms and a courtyard. She wakes up at four in the morning every day and finishes all the household chores before leaving for work. It takes her three hours and three different means of transport to reach her workplace in the city. She washes clothes, sweeps and mops floors and cleans utensils for the next six hours. In addition to her total monthly salary of Rs. 4000 (about 66 US $), she is given meals in the morning and afternoon and eight saris (two from each household) every year.

She rushes back after finishing her work because she does not want to miss the 3 o’clock train or else she would have to wait for an hour for the next one. It takes her another three hours to reach back home, where she is helped by her eldest daughter in the cooking. After they have all eaten dinner, she naps for an hour. When her husband and other children are fast asleep, she is woken up by her eldest daughter. They together attend the night school run by an NGO, from 10:30 to 12:30. Sita’s long day ends at 1 am.

I had asked her once, ”Sita maasi, don’t you get exhausted? You hardly sleep for four hours. ”

She had replied, “Sometimes I do didi. But I cannot afford to feel tired.”

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The Security Force

Ragini, 27, is a Research Scholar at the University of Hyderabad. In the summer of 2013, she was travelling from Hyderabad to Patna with her mother and younger sister in an A.C. 2-tier Sleeper Coach of an express train. This was a journey that she can never forget. That’s because during the night, when they were all fast asleep, she and her sixteen year old sister were physically harassed by a co-passenger. He had crept into their compartment at different times in the night and had touched their legs, thighs and stomach. Ragini wanted to lodge a complaint against him but her mother was naturally afraid as they didn’t have a father or a brother travelling with them to protect them in case things got out of hand.

But Ragini was determined. She convinced her mother and lodged a complaint to the fficer-in-Charge who was travelling in the same coach. As her mother had anticipated, on being confronted, the man completely denied her accusation. Ragini got into a heated argument with him because she knew she wasn’t wrong. Almost everybody in the coach had woken up by then and had gathered around them. Her mother kept on asking her to back off but she did knew she could not stop now. Fortunately, the TTE and the Officer-in-Charge were genuine and helpful men. They supported her and after about fifteen minutes, that man gave in. He accepted that he was guilty. He was made to publicly apologize to Ragini, her mother and her sister. He asked forgiveness with folded hands and promised never to repeat what he had done.

The officer then decided to cease his identity card. The most surprising and shameful part of the incident was that his ID card booklet had a Border Security Force logo on its cover page.

Yes. His name was Manoj Kumar and he was a BSF officer, posted in Guwahati.

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being-a-womanI can narrate many more such stories. For that matter,every woman reading this article can. But I feel that these two enough to prove my point. These are stories of common women in my country and the battles that we fight in our daily lives.

Men folk may argue against these with stories of their personal struggles. My answer to such arguments is that their struggles are neither set in a matriarchal society nor filled with fears of their very basic safety. Moreover, it is not just the background of our struggle that takes it to the level of making it a battle but also the inherent patriarchy in the society, even in women like our mother-in-laws, the stigmas that surround us along with the hundred men who stand up against every single woman who wishes to be in a different league.

I know that it will take many more Nirbhayaas to make the country a safer place for us. I know that the reality of true equality in society will never exist, at least not in my lifetime. But I also know that we have braved the obstacles for many years and the capacity to bear with things is now exhausted. We are not as docile, forbearing and uncomplaining as our mothers and grandmothers.

To the likes of some and dislikes of many others, we have decided to either push those obstacles aside or shatter them when they refuse to be moved. We are moving forward with high heads, bright eyes and quick steps. We have arrived and we are here to stay.